The Power of the Ask

Finding Your Money Zen with Manisha Thakor

• Season 2 • Episode 18

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0:00 | 27:04

Financial thought leader and author Manisha Thakor joins the show to share her approach to financial health and emotional wealth. With over 30 years of experience in financial services, Manisha provides a clear roadmap for dismantling the cultural pressure on women to be perfect. She discusses the core principles of her book, MoneyZen, and explores how women can reclaim their power by asking the right questions of their employers, their partners, and themselves. 

You’ll hear Manisha discuss: 

  • The Perfection Trap: Why the societal expectation for women to be perfect prevents them from asking for raises, and how to embrace the bravery required to advocate for your worth. 
  • Joy-Based Spending: A practical exercise to audit expenses and identify where life energy is being drained by social obligations or costs that offer no emotional return.  
  • Financial Compatibility: The necessity of discussing money values early in relationships to ensure long-term alignment and stability. 
  • The Reality of Wealth: Why assuming net worth based on outward appearances is a mistake and how to stop comparing yourself to a curated image. 

Important Links:

Important Links for Manisha:

  • Manisha's Books Link: (https://moneyzen.com/my-books/)
  • Money Zen Website: (https://moneyzen.com/)

About Manisha Thakor:

Manisha Thakor has worked in financial services for more than thirty years, with an emphasis on women’s economic empowerment and financial well-being. 

A nationally recognized thought-leader in this space, Thakor has been featured in a wide range of publications, including the Wall Street Journal, the New York Times, NPR, PBS, CNN, Real Simple, and Women’s Health. In her most recent book, Money Zen, she breaks down the personal, cultural, and societal forces that have led us to falsely believe we can never have, do, or be enough, and shows us a fresh new path toward “MoneyZen”—her joy-based approach to living a life rich in financial health and emotional wealth. 

Lisa Zeiderman (00:06) 

Hi everyone, and welcome to The Power of the Ask podcast—where we help you get what you need, financially and personally. We’re so glad you’re here. 

I’m Lisa Zeiderman, managing partner at Miller Zeiderman and one of your co-hosts, alongside my dear friend, Precious Williams. Hi, Precious. 

Precious L. Williams (00:25) 

Hey, Queen Lisa! As my queen just said, I’m Precious Williams—known as the Killer Pitch Master and proud founder and CEO of The Perfect Pitch Group. 

Welcome back, welcome back, welcome back! 

Today, we are thrilled to introduce our guest, Manisha Thakor. As you know, we like to give you a little context before our guests completely blow you away. 

Manisha has worked in financial services for more than 30 years, with a deep focus on women’s empowerment and financial wellbeing. She’s a nationally recognized thought leader whose work has been featured in The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times, NPR, PBS, CNN, Real Simple, and Women’s Health. 

In her most recent book, Money Zen, she breaks down the personal, cultural, and societal forces that lead us to believe we can never have, do, or be enough—and offers a fresh path toward financial health and emotional wealth. 

Manisha, we are so excited to have you today. 

Manisha Thakor (01:44) 

Lisa, Precious—thank you so much for having me. I’m really happy to be here. 

 

The Power of the Ask 

Lisa Zeiderman (01:48) 

Manisha, you’ve built an incredible career helping people achieve financial wellbeing through clarity and simplicity. When you hear the phrase “the power of the ask,” what does that mean to you—personally and professionally? 

Manisha Thakor (02:10) 

Professionally, it means two things. 

First, letting women know that when it comes to money, there are no dumb questions. I know that sounds trite, but I cannot emphasize it enough. 

I was married to a man who was 20 years older than me. He looked a bit like George Clooney, so wherever we went, people assumed he was the breadwinner and completely ignored me. Honestly, it was great—I became a fly on the wall. I listened as men confidently talked about money, and much of what they said made no sense. Yet they spoke with certainty. 

That experience made me passionate about helping women feel comfortable asking questions—without shame. 

Personally, the power of the ask means asking myself: What can I shed from my life today to feel more like me? 

Sometimes it’s small—like throwing away three dried-out pens. Sometimes it’s bigger—like realizing I committed to something that makes me miserable and giving myself permission to say no. 

And the other professional ask—one I can’t believe I almost forgot—is asking for a raise. 

I once heard Sally Krawcheck say that during her time as president of Merrill Lynch Wealth Management, she couldn’t recall a single instance where a woman asked for a raise—while men did it all the time. 

So: ask. 

 

Asking for Raises & Advocating for Yourself 

Lisa Zeiderman (04:31) 

I want to share a quick story because it directly connects to what you just said. 

After I gave out raises and bonuses this year, one of my associates came in and asked for more. When I responded, she said, “I learned how to do this through Savvy Ladies—by attending events and listening to what you say.” 

That moment really stayed with me. 

Precious L. Williams (05:15) 

I love that. And Manisha, that leads perfectly into my next question. 

So many women are afraid to ask—for raises, for support, for guidance. From your perspective, what are the psychological or cultural blocks that get in the way? 

Manisha Thakor (05:53) 

It really comes down to something Reshma Saujani says so powerfully: men are taught to be brave, and women are taught to be perfect. 

If you’re supposed to be perfect, then everything should already be working—so why would you ask? 

When I first heard that, I had a full-body reaction because it rang so true. 

 

Money Zen & Joy-Based Spending 

Lisa Zeiderman (06:33) 

In Money Zen, you talk about the intersection of financial health and emotional wellbeing. How does asking—for help, information, or boundaries—play a role in building a healthy relationship with money? 

Manisha Thakor (07:04) 

There are many tools in Money Zen, but I want to share one that listeners can use immediately: joy-based spending. 

In tough economic times, budgeting feels restrictive and depressing. So I encourage people to flip the script. This idea comes from Vicki Robin’s Your Money or Your Life. 

Money represents an exchange of life energy. When you spend money, you’re spending your energy. So instead of focusing on deprivation, ask: How can I squeeze the most joy out of my money? 

Here’s one powerful exercise: 

For one month, write down every expense—no math required. At the end of the month, highlight everything that did not bring you joy. 

That’s where the real insight happens. Sometimes it’s small—streaming services or bills. Sometimes it’s bigger—social obligations you dread, activities your kids hate, or housing costs that are quietly draining your happiness. 

This exercise often becomes life-changing. 

 

Wealth, Appearances & Assumptions 

Precious L. Williams (11:13) 

You’ve worked with people across the wealth spectrum. What patterns do you see in how successful people use—or fail to use—the power of the ask? 

Manisha Thakor (11:31) 

One of the biggest misconceptions is assuming that people who look wealthy actually are. 

I once ran a wealth management firm focused on high-level female executives. I had a $3 million minimum. Many women who appeared impeccably polished—perfect hair, nails, clothes—didn’t come close to that financially. 

The lesson? Don’t assume. Ask yourself if the image you’re comparing yourself to is real. Sometimes it is. Sometimes the Porsche comes with no furniture. 

 

Money Conversations & Relationships 

Lisa Zeiderman (13:47) 

Savvy Ladies is launching a major initiative around money conversations. From your perspective, what are the most important money questions people should be asking—but often don’t? 

Manisha Thakor (14:40) 

In relationships, the most important—and most overlooked—question is: 

Are we financially compatible? 

We ask about emotional, physical, and spiritual compatibility—but rarely financial values. Yet money incompatibility is one of the biggest threats to long-term relationships. 

When my current partner and I were dating, I wanted to discuss finances early—not as judgment, but as alignment. If values don’t align, longevity is unlikely. 

Money conversations can feel scary—but they’re incredibly freeing. 

 

The Big Ask 

Precious L. Williams (19:48) 

Manisha, tell us about a bold ask that changed the trajectory of your life or career. 

Manisha Thakor (20:12) 

Asking to work remotely—20 years ago, before it was common. 

I told my employer we could test it for three months. That ask gave me geographic freedom and completely changed my life. 

 

Rapid Fire 

Lisa Zeiderman 

A book that changed your life? 

Manisha Thakor 

Virginia Woolf’s A Room of One’s Own. 

Precious L. Williams 

A daily grounding habit? 

Manisha Thakor 

Morning pages—three handwritten pages, then tear them up. 

Lisa Zeiderman 

A joyful splurge? 

Manisha Thakor 

An $8 cappuccino—four hours of joy for $2 an hour. 

Precious L. Williams 

One money question everyone should ask? 

Manisha Thakor 

Is this truly bringing me joy? 

 

Final Question 

Precious L. Williams (23:48) 

Why is the power of the ask so crucial for women—especially financially? 

Manisha Thakor (23:59) 

Because when you own your finances—intellectually and emotionally—you own your power. 

It’s not about how much money you have. It’s about knowing that you own it. 

 

Closing 

Precious L. Williams (24:31) 

Didn’t I tell y’all? Manisha dropped gems today. 

Queen Lisa and I thank you so much for joining us. 

Lisa Zeiderman (24:53) 

Thank you, Manisha. This was incredible. 

Precious L. Williams (25:00) 

And to our listeners—The Power of the Ask exists for you. Keep coming back, tell a friend to tell a friend, and keep having the money conversations you deserve.